Become the person you were meant to be, upgrade the version of your true self.
Becoming The One
Most people are looking to find the one? Dating, attracting the wrong types, ending up with the same disappointments and hurt…if this sounds like you, this is where you discover that it’s not your fault, the best part is that it can all change in a matter of weeks as with many others just like you, they are now in a happy, loving warm relationship that lasts.
Who are you….Really, do you really know yourself?
Your identity is how you see yourself on the inside, and how your self concept aligns with how others see you.
Some women are truly beautiful, everyone tells them, but they don’t see themselves that way.
Some are exceptionally skilled, talented, capable. While all the evidence is congruent with those achievements and results, they feel like a fraud inside.
Others have had wonderful potential partners, or have been in relationships, but they never feel good enough to be loved and sabotage those relationships.
Many years ago Maxwell Malts, a plastic surgeon was fascinated to discover there was a vast difference in reactions in his patients. Some aligned with their obvious improved physical appearance and felt more confident and happy.
Others, did not see any change in their reflection, and he realised their internal self image was not allowing them to see themselves the way they were but persisted in the self image of the sub-conscious self image, created many years before.
Your internal identity is determined by the self conscious self concept and self image, which then determines the beliefs we have about ourselves, our behaviour, thoughts, expectations and outcomes.
That is where your identity comes from, how that was formed by your environment and surrounding, care givers, experiences, events.
The architecture of your mind determines the architecture of your life.
Once you decide to get your power back, you can choose to redesign your inner landscape and your outer world will transform.
Healthy Self Esteem, is a fundamental requirement for a healthy Relationship.
Some people have Self Efficacy, in life they are able to work, have income and confidence in their ability to cope with Life’s basic challenges.
Earning a living and take independent Care of One’s self in the World.
Relationships, Require the other part of Self Esteem: Self Respect, which entails the expectation of friendship, love, and deserving happiness as a natural result of who we are and what we do.
Self Esteem is diminished by childhood adversity, it can also alter during life, as a consequence of life’s events.
Good self esteem requires a solid sense of self. When people choose each other, unconsciously they will be attracted to someone who seems familiar and matches our own level of self esteem.
High self esteem people are generally not attracted to low self esteem partners as a rule.
If you want a good relationship, start with healing your self esteem, so you become a match for the partner you want.
Relationships are formed as a result of childhood caregiver experiences, these form the self’s perception and programs how relationships will play out later in life.
People who are securely attached are said to have greater trust, can connect to others and as a result are more successful in life. Insecurely attached people tend to mistrust others, lack social skills and have problems forming relationships. There is one type of secure attachment and there are 3 types of insecure attachments: Anxious/Ambivalent , Anxious/Avoidant and Anxious/Disorganized. In responses to distress, the first 3 react organized, while the last acts disorganized.
Free Resources & Advice
Attachment Trauma Recovery for singles
What is Attachment Trauma?
Why does it stop you from having warm and loving relationships that last?
How does it cause you to keep being drawn to the wrong relationships?
Attachment Trauma is caused by dysfunctional early childhood parenting or caregivers. Impacting the Child in ways that were not consistently available, reliable, or denying the child’s fundamental needs, or even more damaging, verbal, psychological, physical or sexual abuse, neglect and maltreatment.
This creates the forming brain to become alerted to danger and self survival. Because the Young brain realizes that it needs to find ways to stay safe as it cannot trust other people and becomes anxious or avoidant, dis-regulated, confused, unable to determine how to have connection and belonging while feeling afraid of others.
The sub-conscious brain learns from experiences and records what was familiar, it then keeps looking for and being drawn to people that are psychologically very similar to their original care giver, hoping this time that person will love them and make them feel safe. Except the familiar will repeat the same behaviors and the Hurt.
How to Heal
Recovery from the past requires reprogramming at the sub-conscious level. Since the brain has the capacity to re-wire through neuroplasticity we can re-write your programming and re-train your brain.
Since these old programs have created limiting beliefs, fears, filters in how you see the world and others,
Your brain and body have become adapted to the chemical responses of those emotional states. For the organic and emotional mapping and reprogramming,
A series of of sessions are required from 8 to 16 weekly sessions of 1.5 to 2 hrs each on line. There will be assessments to be filled out and a strategy call that will determine which program is best for you.
Just know that this will also allow you to be trained in how and whom you attract in your relationship life.
Many clients meet their life partner in 8 weeks.
Find out more
Message me below today to schedule a FREE 45-minute consultation to discuss how I can help you overcome what’s affecting you